This Guest Post is by Simon Cruise, author of DetectDeceit
You cannot simultaneously bring out the polygraph and lie detection test each time you suspect that your partner may be cheating on you. But you can act like a human lie detector machine. All you need are the right tools and the proper mindset.
Here is a checklist of the things that you can do to know exactly if your partner is lying to you, or worse, if he is cheating on you.
Watch out for the common signs of cheating spouses. Changes in sex drive, changes in his habits, and changes in his daily routine are possible signs of cheating. Moreover, look for instances when he avoids any type of confrontation. If he suddenly backs out and gives way when you fight and he does not do that before, then he may be holding back onto something.
Now that you know what to look for, then you must write down the specifics. Keep a journal. The journal has to be something that’s tangible, not a digital note on your cell phone or your laptop. These details will show a pattern later. A journal is important because there is no way that you can remember all the suspicious little details that add to your growing suspicion.
And be specific and objective. Jot down the date and time when he came home late. Jot down the date and time when you found it strange that he showered the moment he got home. Always keep that journal safely hidden away.
After two or three days have passed, catch him off guard and ask him about one or two of those details. Pay attention to his reaction and his choice of words when he answers you. Here are some indicators of lying that you might find useful. Look for 3 or 4 of these – that’s a reliable gauge that a person is lying to you.
2. Touching of the face and the hair
3. Doing hand shrugs (lifts the hand or hands then quickly drops it) or shoulder shrugs
4. Use of humor or sarcasm to change the subject
5. Looking up to the left upper corner eye direction (for right-handed people)
6. Dilated pupils
7. Over denying or multiple protests of innocence
8. Answering with too many extraneous details
It is helpful to understand how the process of lying and its biometric patterns work. That knowledge can be handy not just in workplace or domestic situations but also in the day to day life. Handbooks like DetectDeceit can elucidate and help.