You’ve cheated. Your wife no longer trusts you and you’re not sure what to do next. It’s an incredibly trying time. It’s also the time that can determine whether your marriage survives the affair, or not. You play an important role in helping her get over the affair.
Understand Her Pain Comes First
Regardless of what led to the affair, you caused the pain and her feelings come first. It is imperative to the healing of your marriage for you to take responsibility for the current state of your marriage. It’s also essential to allow your wife to experience whatever emotions she’s feeling. And realize that they may be inconsistent. She may be furious one second and sad the next. It’s a painful and confusing time for her.
Absolutely No Contact with the Other Woman
The only way to begin healing is to eliminate all contact with the other person. It’s not possible to focus on your marriage if there’s another person involved.
Help Your Wife Find Closure
Each person deals with infidelity in their own time and way. It’s very possible that your spouse will experience several different emotions and have many reactions. One day she may want you to check in every hour on the hour.
The next day she may not want so look at you or talk to you. If you want to heal your marriage it’s important to help your wife in any way she needs. If she needs you to check in with her, then check in with her. If she needs space, give it to her.
Honesty and open communication is an important part of the healing process. Be honest about your feelings without assigning blame to your wife. It’s natural for your wife to lose faith and trust in you. She will need you to be honest with her about where you’ve been, where you’re going, and what you want and need from her. Be prepared to answer any question she has with complete honesty.
In addition to spending time with your wife, it’s also important to be present when you’re with her. Make her the focus of your attention when you’re together. Show her that she is important to you and that repairing your marriage is your highest priority.
Be Open to Outside Help
If your wife wants to seek counseling, marriage coaching or to participate in a marriage program go all in. Outside help can make a huge difference. If you do commit to a marriage repair program be sure to give it 100%.
Finally, Be Patient
There is no set time table for getting over an affair. It can take years. Your spouse may seem like they’ve completely moved past the affair and then it’ll come up again and cause a rift in your marriage. Be patient with your spouse as they sort through their emotions and reaction to your affair.
An Affair Doesn’t Have to Be the End of Your Marriage
You’ve cheated and it’s going to take time and hard work for you and your wife to get past it. End the affair and don’t look back. Make a commitment to your wife and your marriage and give her time. Not everyone can get over their husband’s affair but with the right attitude and effort there is hope.
What to do Next? Start by getting a copy of the “How To Survive an Affair” program. It will give you a step-by-step roadmap for dealing with the infidelity and your wife’s emotions and feelings. Don’t waste another minute, now is the time to take action and get your marriage back on track. Click here to learn more.