After the affair has been revealed, communication between partners is nearly impossible. In fact it can be strained to the point of a complete shutdown. As the injured spouse, you may be struggling with a range of disquieting thoughts about your spouse and the future of your relationship.
It can become a challenge to talk to your spouse when all you want to do is to shout out your anger, frustration and pain. Your cheating spouse may also be having a hard time dealing with his or her own questions, thoughts and feelings and maybe wondering how best to express these concerns.
In having an affair, your spouse was being disloyal and not being honest with you. This dishonest behavior is what’s keeping you and your spouse from reestablishing communication based on trust, and is often why initial attempts to communicate after the affair are marked by temper flare-ups and accusations. As the injured spouse, you may feel compelled to express the hurt, anger, disappointment, and pain that you are feeling toward your spouse.
If your intention is to heal your marriage, then it is crucial that both you and your spouse agree to be honest with each other. Healing will not be achieved with one or both partners continuing to be dishonest. Establishing honesty as a foundation for communication after the affair has been revealed is vital to repairing your relationship. The communication pathway between you and your spouse must be improved and repaired